The Mean Reds

It was the first time in a very long period when I put my laptop away. My desk was empty, but the good kind of empty. Suddenly a rush of thoughts appeared. I pulled back my computer onto the desk in order to write them. The sad thing was, I couldn’t remember those thoughts. Poof, they were gone. Just like that.

I remember vaguely thinking I should write more often, develop ideas for my scripts. Thinking one day I’ll be gone, and this (very hopefully) might not. My mind has been preoccupied with life and death recently… Nothing too depressive, but rather insightful… I just finished reading “Breakfast at Tiffany’s” and the ending was awful. It left me with this aggravated feeling… I don’t know… It all just adds up, so excuse me for being so annoyed and obscure at the moment, there’s a lot going on…

Here’s a better way of putting things:
Holly Golightly: You know those days when you get the mean reds?
Paul Varjak: The mean reds. You mean like the blues?
Holly: No. The blues are because you’re getting fat, and maybe it’s been raining too long. You’re just sad, that’s all. The mean reds are horrible. Suddenly you’re afraid, and you sweat like hell but you don’t know what you’re afraid of. Do you ever get that feeling?

the mean reds

P.S: A comment might make me feel better…

– Saffron

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About saffroncopper

I'm the girl of your dreams. I may not exist. Go back to sleep.
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3 Responses to The Mean Reds

  1. t says:

    oh my dearest… I’m not just leaving a comment to make you feel better. I nod my head and all there really is to say is I KNOW BABY.

    Just don’t pull the laptop back next time. Try grabbing a real notebook instead… It might bear some new fruit.

    … and keep your fans in mind.
    <3

  2. My dear Saffron, I know that too.

    You have great ideas for sure. I know them quite well, I think we all need to share our fears if we don’t understand them ourselves. If you are afraid of something, whatever it is, just share that, with anybody. Maybe that will make you feel better. It’s better not to understand something with someone than not to understand something completely alone.

    Fears, thinking of life and death, it all can make us feel very lonely. I assure you though, you’re not Forever Alone.

  3. ayelet says:

    I know how you feel..and have nothing encouraging to say..other than those moments of mean reds pass..
    Just keep on writing..

    Love the picture, as usual.

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